08.12.16
Rain drops slide down the windows, all the earth crying, sad with sin. A storm of emotions compete for mastery; fear, sorrow, anger, embarrassment.
I thought I was his. I was his! I belonged to him.
You belong to Me.
Sunlight shafts through a rent in the clouds, warm on my face, a brilliant warm from a bright, grey sky. Peace feels warm and alive, peace says, I'm sorry- forgive me. Peace explains. Peace, like a river, even if only for a moment, even if only long enough for a fresh beginning.
Two lakes, blue like blueberries under that same, grey sky. Naomi's hazel eyes, round with wonder, her cheeks dimpling deliciously and her pure, bubbling laughter. Tony's love, in its proper sphere. If only I could wash in this sea of gratitude every moment of every day. If only I could feel things, clear and warm and new, moment by moment.
Christ lived his life full, completely abandoned to the pursuit of holiness, a moment by moment, realistic, mystical, self-sacrificing life.
Only He will make me unafraid of the storms of life- unafraid of my own and other people's success or failure, unafraid of death; unafraid of life itself. Maran atha.
And he shewed me a pure river of water of life, clear as crystal, proceeding out of the throne of God and of the Lamb.
In the midst of the street of it, and on either side of the river, was there the tree of life, which bare twelve manner of fruits, and yielded her fruit every month: and the leaves of the tree were for the healing of the nations.
Revelations 22 1-2
